范文无忧网面试笔试实习报告

外企员工英文辞职报告

01月10日 编辑 fanwen51.com

[感恩节的故事英文]The Pilgrims who sailed to this country aboard the Mayflower were originally members of the English Separatist Church (a Puritan sect). They had earlier fled th...+阅读

DearXXX,

As a graduate of an institution of higher education, I he a few very basic expectations. Chief among these is that my direct superiors he an intellect that ranges above the mon ground squirrel. After your consistent and annoying harassment of my co-workers and me during the mission of our duties, I can only surmise that you are one of the few true geic wastes of our time.

Asking me, a work administrator, to explain every little nuance of everything I do each time you happen to stroll into my office is not only a waste of time, but also a waste of precious oxygen. I was hired because I know how to work puter systems, and you were apparently hired to provide amusement to myself and other employees, who watch you vainly attempt to understand the concept of cut and paste for the hundredth time.

You will never understand puters. Something as incredibly simple as binary still gives you too many options. You will also never understand why people hate you, but I am going to try and explain it to you, even though I am sure this will be just as effective as telling you what an IP address is. Your shiny new iMac has more personality than you ever will.

You walk around the building all day, shiftlessly looking for fault in others. You he a sharp dressed, useless look about you that may he worked for your interview, but now that you actually he responsibility, you pawn it off on overworked staff, hoping their talent will cover for your glaring ineptitude. In a world of managerial evolution, you are the blue-green algae that everyone else eats and laughs at. Managers like you are a sad proof of the Dilbert principle.

Since this situation is unlikely to change without you getting a full frontal lobotomy reversal, I am forced to tender my resignation. However, I he a few parting thoughts.

1. When someone calls you in reference to employment, it is illegal for you to give me a bad remendation. The most you can say to hurt me is I prefer not to ment. I will he friends randomly call you over the next couple of years to keep you honest, because I know you would be unable to do it on your own.

2. I he all the passwords to every account on the system, and I know every password you he used for the last five years. If you decide to get cute, I am going to publish your forites list, which I conveniently sed when you made me back up your useless files. I do believe that terms like Lolita are not usually viewed forably by the administration.

3. When you borrowed the digital camera to take pictures of your Mothers birthday, you neglected to mention that you were going to take pictures of yourself in the mirror nude. Then you fot to erase them like the techno-moron you really are. Suffice it to say I he never seen such odd acts with a sauce bottle, but I assure you that those he been copied and kept in safe places pending the authoring of a glowing letter of remendation. (Try to use a spell check please; I hate hing to correct your mistakes.)

Thank you for your time, and I expect the letter of remendation on my desk by 8:00 am tomorrow. One word of this to anybody, and all of your little twisted repugnant obsessions will be open to the public. Never screw with your systems administrator. Why? Because they know what you do with all that free time!

Wishing you a grand and glorious day.

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